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ForecastNewsObserver. All NewsObituariesCrimeWeatherLocalCountiesDatabasesEducationHealthNation/WorldReligionScienceTrafficWeirdColumnistsBlogsPhotosVideosRecent HeadlinesSt. Augustine's ousts president, reinstates two other officials'Promising lead' emerges in hunt for Flight 370VA hospitals in NC paid out $4.7 million in wrongful-death claims in post-9/11 decadeAthlete advocacy group files complaint against UNC-Chapel HillMore News Take The N&O news quizWhat happened in the news last week? Check out your current events savvy with our quiz. All SportsBaseballBlogsCanesCollegeColumnistsDukeGolfHigh SchoolNBANC StateNFLNHLNorth CarolinaOutdoorsPanthersPhotosRacingSoccerTennisRecent HeadlinesConnecticut wins NCAA title, 60-54 over KentuckyUNC quarterback Mitch Trubisky focused on beating Marquise Williams for starting jobCanes face tough personnel decisions as offseason loomsRains washes out 1st day at MastersMore Sports NCAA championship Connecticut 60, Kentucky 54 | 04.07. 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All CommunitiesCary NewsChapel Hill NewsClayton News StarDurham NewsEastern Wake NewsGarner Cleveland RecordThe Smithfield HeraldMidtown Raleigh NewsNorth Raleigh NewsSouthwest Wake NewsMom2MomTriangle.comRecent HeadlinesBaseball making a home on the roadDBAP’s new concessions are a hit with fansBest: Voyager’s baseball team is all ‘grown up’Rugby: Warriors’ first season ends in playoffsMore Communities Baghdad Bakery offers a taste of the Middle East in CarySue Al-Atar, an Iraqi refugee who came to North Carolina in 1978, says she wants to serve the hundreds... FamilyAsk Mr. Ask Mr. St. Canes face tough personnel decisions as offseason loomsDear Mr. Dad: My son is 6, and he's still having temper tantrums. Call me crazy, but I thought they would have petered out long ago. Most of the other parents we know say their kids stopped having tantrums when they were 2 or 3. But my son is giving no indication that he's going to relent anytime soon. What should we do? How long do we have to wait for him to stop?A: Since you asked for it, I'll tell you: You're crazy. If you think you can just sit around and wait for your son to grow out of throwing tantrums, you're going to be very, very disappointed and frustrated. In fact, given how long this has lasted, there's a good chance that you and your spouse are the reason your son is still having tantrums in the first place. The only way to bring his reign of terror to an end is for you to step in and start doing something about it. Now.Your Friends Are RightAlmost all children have temper tantrums, but they usually end by age 3 - unless there's something going on that encourages the child to continue. Tantrums are actually a fairly normal developmental phase: they're the way children test the limits to see what they can and cannot get away with. But just because something is normal doesn't mean you should let it go. Making it very clear to young children that they can't have their way every time teaches them what the rules are and, more importantly, helps them learn to control themselvesTantrums won't blow over. And they won't go away on their own. At this point, getting your son to express his feelings without pitching a fit is going to be hard, but it can be done. And the only way that's going to happen is if you stop trying to be your child's friend and start being a parent. Unfortunately, that means you're going to have to be the bad guy. Your first mission is to work with your spouse to come up with firm boundaries and even firmer consequences if those rules get broken. It's essential that you're both on the same page here. Consider Other OptionsThe first few days and weeks of the new "we've-got-rules-around-here-mister" plan will be uncomfortable, but when your son realizes that you're serious, he'll most likely start changing. I say "most likely" because, even though tantrums can be the result of a lack of structure and rules in the home, there can be other causes. If, for example, your son's tantrums are violent and he's doing harm to himself or anyone else, you may be dealing less with a limit-testing issue and more with a mental health issue. Behavior that looks like tantrums can actually be caused by a number of conditions such as autism, Asperger's, ADHD, or OCD. If you feel you've tried everything to get your son's temper under control and are still coming up empty, seek out professional help.I get that when some parents hear the phrase "professional help," they immediately imagine that their child will be put on medication for life. Just so you know, those fears aren't necessarily well-founded. There are many, many options that don't involve medication at all, such as individual talk therapy, family counseling, and group behavior training. But the first step is to get your son evaluated so he can get the help he deserves.(Read Armin Brott's blog at DadSoup.com, send email to armin@mrdad.com, and follow him on Twitter @mrdad) Copyright 2014 McClatchy-Tribune_News_Service. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, rewritten or redistributed. News & Observer is pleased to provide this opportunity to share information, experiences and observations about what's in the news. Some of the comments may be reprinted elsewhere in the site or in the newspaper. We encourage lively, open debate on the issues of the day, and ask that you refrain from profanity, hate speech, personal comments and remarks that are off point. Thank you for taking the time to offer your thoughts. Triangle Network: News & Observer | Triangle. © 2014 www.newsobserver.com and wire service sources. All Rights Reserved. http://www.newsobserver. 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